That One Kind Word-What It Can Mean When You Hear It From Another Mom. For the Amazing Carmen

Have you ever just had one of those days? One of those days where you ran around like a chicken with your head cut off and still feel like you have accomplished absolutely nothing? I think this might be my current summer mom persona! A few weeks into summer and I’m still finding my groove. If you’re like me you want to make those memories and slow things down to enjoy the summer break but you still have things that you have to do. You find maybe yourself constantly juggling and end the day exhausted sometimes with a little mom guilt thrown in for good measure.

I often ask myself if I should stop worrying as much about things around the house getting done or not sign myself up for as many work deadlines so that I can be more present. At the same time I wrestle with wanting to set an example for the children of mommy following her passion and mommy being responsible. This slope is the slipperiest in the summer when they’re always around and I can’t get these other things done while they’re at school and be fully present when they get home. Are you with me ladies, are you feeling this?

Today as I drove to pick up my kid at morning camp I asked myself if I could list one thing that I have gotten done today and finished. I went on to list the things that still had yet to be done. There was nothing on that list about being proud of myself for the article that I just published which was so much fun to work on, nothing about the morning cuddle that I had with the child that needed it most. I didn’t give myself credit for the special breakfast that I made or the fact that I had managed to get three loads of laundry done before 8 AM. It was all about what I hadn’t done NOT what I had and so many of us I think fall into this trap. What I didn’t know was that I was about to run into someone who would remind me about focusing on the positive effect that I made.

At camp pick up I ran into Carmen, Carmen is a fellow mom who I run into more and more frequently these days. Whenever I see her she always looks to be exactly where I am, kids the same age doing the school thing or the summer thing and I rarely don’t see her with a smile on her face in the process. She always appears mellow and pulled together and present. (C-I know there are moments I don’t see too, you are human afte all!!). I’m lucky because today she was present for me.

As we greeted hello she turned to me and said “I really love reading your blog. I feel like I know you and I feel like we’re chatting every time I read it.” I was so deeply touched because that’s why I started the blog in the first place!!!! She had literally in one sentence nailed down the reason why this all began and why I still continue to do it. I sort of jokingly said “Well come around today I’m talking about leggings”…to which she replied I’ve already seen that!

What I want to say to you women out there is that you might be a Carmen for someone else today. Maybe you were and didn’t know it! When you notice that a busy mom is trying her best and you compliment her on that-you might change the course of her day! You might change her mind set and better still you might raise her confidence! We know that when another mom notices something you’re pouring yourself and your heart into it means a lot! It means more to us because they are where we are!

In the case of the exact words that were used to compliment me I can only say how deeply I appreciated hearing them. Sometimes I wonder in my moments of insecurity if this blog is being received the way that I hoped it would be! I’ve gotten some great feedback but there are also occasional moments of crickets too! I remind myself in these times that someone is nodding along I just can’t always see it…I’m still always excited to talk with you either way! Whenever we hang out no matter how long it’s been I’m excited! What I have come to realize is how special these conversations have been, not only to me, but maybe to others as well and how deeply glad that I am to be having them! It really is amazing to be surrounded by you incredible women who continue to support and laugh with me along the way.

I end this quick note by saying a very special thank you to my very special reader Carmen! Carmen-If you should find yourself making your own personal list of your accomplishments from today I hope that you’re remember to add on that you made another mom feel proud of herself! I only hope that this little note spotlighting you will make you feel the same way you made me feel!

To all my summer of moms out there I say this to you-May the odds be ever in your favor and I Mommy Hunger Games salute you! We may have some stumbles this summer but there will always be someone to help pick us back up again and I hope that you’ll keep coming by so that we can exchange summer mama stories-the epic triumphs and the not so epic days too! Xx Janet

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